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Duality
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We often put a tag on ourselves, accepting only some parts of our personality.
We accept a word like “independent” but don’ realize that sometimes
we should say “selfish”. We might like to call ourselves “ambitious”,
without realizing that we often act “stubborn”. Her is a practice that
can give you more insight on who you are and enable you to respond to
various situations in your life with a better understanding of your
actions. It is also useful to experience this exercise while trying
to see yourself in a non-restrictive manner.
1. First of all, write down three personal qualities you have which
you feel good about. For example:
I am dedicated.
I am dependable.
I am good at heart.
2. Secondly, add an "alternative reality" to each one of the statements.
This means that you should find examples when the opposite of the initial
statement is also true. Here’s how it might look:
I am dedicated in a work related environment, but sometimes I can also
be easily distracted from my task.
I am dependable and trustworthy when it comes to my work place, but
I can also sometimes be less dependable with my friends.
I am good at heart, but sometimes I act selfishly and without regards
for other people’s feelings.
3. At this point you should reverse the sentence topics, and even modify
some words if you feel it helps. Starting with the negative aspects
that accompany your personality will give you more insight and offer
you a better perspective on these issues.
Her is how it may look like after the transformation:
I am sometimes distracted from my work, but I am usually dedicated to
my chores, especially in a business environment.
My friends may find me less dependable at times, but when it comes to
work I am a person you can count on.
I sometimes ignore what other people wish, but I am good at heart most
of the time.
Take a look at the last two lists (steps 2 and 3) and read them carefully
for a few minutes. Don’t pay attention to the topic of the sentence
but try to focus on the meanings your words expressed. Always keep in
mind the purpose of this little exercise: “black” and “white” are rarely
defining for a person. By identifying your duality you get a better
chance of appreciating your actions and the responses they trigger.
You have also created a list of three qualities and three negative aspects
that you believe characterize you. The first step in removing the negative
characteristics was already taken – you identified them. Now it is time
to put the exercise to practical use. Next time you find yourself in
a situation where a choice has to be made or a decision to be taken,
try to remember the exercise. Observe that particular situation from
a dual point of view by acknowledging your positive features while also
analyzing the attached negative parts. Practice can lead to a natural
integration of this exercise in your conscious and subconscious mind.
After a while, you may not even need to make a conscious effort to analyze
a situation from both perspectives and this process will come naturally.
A much desired objectivity can appear between your positive and negative
characteristics, and you can use it to make the right choices in most
situations.
About The Author:
Peter Dobler successfully operates several web sites on the topic of
internet marketing and web site optimization. Visit his main web site
at:
http://www.sell1on1.com
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